Page 45 - Because I know, I can let go

Why do we get angry?

There’s no need for anger, but ignorance, infatuation, make us angry, causes irritation,
conflict. Is it making gains, or making losses, or breaking even that causes anger? It’s not
making gains or breaking even, it’s taking losses. Being defeated by the defilements is

tantamount to losing, if they’re harsh then any loss feels harsh too, if middling, then the
loss has the same quality, if defilement is operating on the subtle level then any loss will
be subtly felt too.

It’s about how we see ourselves so it’s all in the mind: when we see ourselves as better than
somebody else it feels like we get something, which is really quite insane.

Hence don’t go about wanting to get the better of anyone. If we want to win there must

also be defeat. And such gains are deceptive, they won’t amount to true victories, they’ll
be ignorant victories. Ignorance makes us feel that we win. We defeat someone in life,
but, in reality, we’re the losers, we’re ruined, entirely ruined by the kilesa, by māra.

Don’t have the desire to be better than this or that person, it will cause more than mere
defeat. If we feel gloomy then regard that as being like a loss, a defeat, we’re glum, we’re
touchy because of the influence of greed, for instance, or gloomy because of aversion,
or anger, or ill-will, or because of delusion, all of which is tantamount to losing, to being

defeated, being defeated by the defilements, and there’s no way that can be called
winning. Although we may criticize someone until our jaw aches, yet they don’t respond,
that sort of thing is even more of a defeat. Foolish people think they win when nobody

disagrees with their statements. This is to be unaware of ānapākiyasaññā, that is, of seeing
something as being a loss, not to mention the other two.

If we’re talking about worldly people, those with sensual desires, it’s all about being
defeated, if not by another person then by the defilements. In some cases it’s both, people

and our own defilements, then it’s double distress.

To sum up: there’s no benefit to got from seeing anything as a loss, a gain, or as a breaking

even, and to regard things in this way is useless when it comes to defeating defilement.

...I can let go 45